Quick question: how are you holding yourself right now?
Are your shoulders back? Is your chin tilted upright? Or is your back hunched? Are your legs crossed in your lap?
The few questions above are just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to parsing out our body language, particularly as it relates to professional vs unprofessional body language. Now, when we think of professional body language, our minds may immediately drift to managing eye contact or not crossing one’s arms—both of which are important to projecting a professional appearance! Body language extends far beyond these two qualities, however, and today we’re going to examine three key categories all of us can focus on to improve our professional body language.
Before we begin, I want to offer a reminder that any of us can be susceptible to embodying unprofessional behaviors and appearances—and I do mean any of us! Body language tends to be unconscious, meaning we are often not aware of the exact messages our body is communicating at any given point. To increase our air of professionalism, we must therefore be intentional in increasing attention to our behavior and making adjustments to improve our professional presentation.
Without further ado, let’s dive in!
1. Confidence
When it comes to projecting confidence, I like to suggest the following question as a starting point in drawing our attention to how we hold ourselves: “When [we]’re frustrated or overwhelmed, where do [we] place [our] hands?”
Many of us are likely already aware of how good posture, e.g. keeping our back straight and chin up, is associated with confidence and attention, as who hasn’t been told not to slouch by a parent or guardian or teacher throughout our lives? (I’m getting flashbacks to my childhood…) But projecting confidence goes beyond straightening our spine, and one of the most important areas to focus on is avoiding fidgeting.
Whether it’s moving a chair back and forth, tapping a pen, or rapidly shaking a leg, fidgeting behaviors often come across as unprofessional because they suggest nerves—or rather, a lack of confidence. During an interview I once conducted, the interviewee in question simply would not stop fidgeting. Shifting from side to side, picking at the hem of their sleeves—I knew this person was almost certainly just stressed and nervous, but this behavior did not come across as a positive sign that they would confidently fill the role they were interviewing for!
Correcting our tendency to fidget may be easier said than done, but a good first step is simply making an effort to be more intentional about how we present our hands. During meetings or discussions, for example, we can use controlled hand gestures to emphasize our points, imbuing our actions with meaning to help ensure we’re less likely to succumb to unintentional movements. Additionally, we can keep our hands visible and relaxed, such as resting them on the table during a conversation. Seeing someone’s hands actually helps communicate that we can trust said person, and thus making our own hands visible can demonstrate our own honesty and trustworthiness! Ever gotten a negative feeling about someone who constantly keeps their hands in their pockets or hidden under a table? That’s because our brain unconsciously concludes that this person is hiding something. In other words, to project confidence and openness, keep those hands visible!
When it comes to presenting confident body language, of course, we should be cautious about swinging too far to the other end of the spectrum. Picture this: in the middle of a conversation, the person we’re talking to puts their hands on their hips, all of a sudden taking up twice the amount of the space in the narrow hallway the two of us currently occupy. How does this shift in body language make us feel?
While putting one’s hands on one’s hands can communicate a sense of confidence and control, it can also be read as aggressive, unwittingly causing discomfort in the person on the receiving end of this posture. In other words, putting our hands on our hips may come across as overcompensating in the realm of confidence!
If we’re looking for an intentional act of body language to demonstrate confidence that is less likely to be read as aggressive, I recommend steepling: putting our hands together so the tips of our fingers touch, but the palms remain separate. This gesture is common among world leaders, politicians, and executives, as steepling suggests confidence, conviction, and sincerity. Just be advised not to overuse steepling! Because it’s a very precise gesture, I recommend employing this language in high-importance settings as opposed to incorporating it into our everyday professionalism.
Projecting confidence extends beyond controlling our hands, of course! On the most minute level, chewing or biting our lips can suggest insecurity. Taking a step back, our clothes can exude professionalism, too—are they ironed? Clean? It’s not about the expense of our outfits, but rather how put-together we appear!
To circle back to the start of this section, straight posture is important, and a necessary follow-up is noting how we sit. In other words, when we sit down, we will appear more confident and professional when we sit all the way back in our chair. Sitting on the edge of our seats, in contrast, can suggest anxiety that in turn may make those around us feel more uncomfortable, and there’s little more unprofessional than causing discomfort in those around us!
Not too difficult so far, right? Onto the next category!
2. Distractions
What’s more frustrating than trying to have a conversation with someone whose mind seems to be pulled in 20 directions at once? When it comes to presenting professional body language, minimizing distractions in our environment is key to coming across as respectful and attentive.
As a general tip, we should avoid frequently checking our phones/watches/etc., as this behavior suggests boredom, impatience, and a general lack of professionalism. In my experience, I tend to notice this behavior from individuals in more powerful positions, such as a manager who constantly checks their email while a team member attempts to hold a conversation with them. Remember: there’s a time and place to stay connected with technology, and more often than not, the middle of a conversation is not that moment! In other words, embodying professional body language in these circumstances means removing distractions—we can put our phone on silent, close our email, and in general make an effort to keep a lid on any tasks that will try to pull us away from a professional conversation. No screen deserves more attention than a person we’re speaking to!
Another example of unprofessional body language to avoid is overly adjusting our clothes. Reminiscent of fidgeting, continually adjusting our attire can suggest anxiety, as this behavior communicates we are literally uncomfortable in our own clothes. As a very literal solution, then, we can take time every day to evaluate how relaxed we feel in our professional clothing before we leave the house! Taking this small action helps ensure we aren’t distracted by our attire at any point during the day.
Ready for the final category?
3. Engagement
As a nice segue, it goes without saying that reducing distractions to improve professional body language also helps ensure we are projecting ourselves as engaged and invested during professional situations! We’ve all been told to avoid crossing our arms, of course, as doing so can risk suggesting we’re bored, but physically demonstrating our engagement in a professional setting extends beyond this advice.
Consider the following scenario: two people are watching the same presentation. One person, we’ll call them Ashley, is facing directly toward the presenter. Their feet are flat on the ground, and their shoulders are back—though relaxed—giving the impression that their body is open.
The other person, we’ll call them Creon, is sitting at an angle toward the presenter. Their shoulders are hunched over, giving the impression that their body is closed, and they have their legs out in a reclining fashion. At some points, Creon even drums their fingers on the table in front of them.
Based on their respective body language, who do you think is demonstrating more engagement with the presenter?
I can hear it now: a sea of voices have all said “Ashley!” in enthusiastic unison.
In all seriousness, physically facing the person we’re interacting with goes a long way in demonstrating engagement, because to literally turn away from someone implies we are figuratively “turned away” from the topic at hand. Similarly, keeping our feet flat on the ground projects stability and investment, while lounging in a seat tends to give the impression that we’re bored or otherwise not engaged, and drumming one’s fingers on the table can project impatience.
If we’re on the other side of this scenario as the presenter, a surefire way to demonstrate engagement through our body language is by moving purposefully during our presentation. “Purpose” is absolutely key here; we should avoid pacing, which can come across as shedding nervous energy, just as we should generally avoid remaining in one place for an entire presentation, which can risk implying a lack of effort or interest.
Maintaining engaged body language to communicate professionalism is equally important in more casual professional settings, too, such as chatting with a colleague on break. One crucial strategy is to avoid touching others without their consent, including when it comes to more relaxed body language, such as clapping a person on the shoulder. When in doubt about a person’s preferences, simply ask! We should avoid assuming that all individuals are okay with a hug or pat on the back or a hand on their shoulder.
Another strategy is to avoid excessive laughter. Now, I don’t mean that we shouldn’t laugh or smile in the workplace! Any setting without laughter and joy is one I wouldn’t want to go near. But excessive laughter, in contrast, can suggest that a person is not confident or is unfocused on the work at hand. Again, I encourage smiles and laughter in the workplace, but when someone only ever seems to be smiling and laughing and is otherwise not attuned to their tasks, that can be a sign of unprofessionalism!
We’ve covered numerous examples of professional and unprofessional body language in this blog, which I hope serves as an informative starting point as we all seek to increase awareness of how we present ourselves in professional situations. As leaders, though, we must be sure to take in all of these strategies with one key caveat as we observe the body language of our employees: give people the benefit of the doubt.
Reading body language is not a science, and we must thus be careful to notice if we are assuming something about a person’s beliefs exclusively based on their body language. If someone is crossing their arms in front of us, are they actually bored, or is this position simply comfortable? If someone is fidgeting with a pen, are they actually inattentive, or do they have ADHD or another disability? This latter point is especially crucial as we all seek to make our workplaces more inclusive toward people with disabilities, as some disabilities (such as Tourette’s) can produce particular body language or result in repetitive movements that we should not hold against our employees.
Even if a person does not have a disability, we should always keep an open mind and consider the other factors that may be shaping their body language. One of my employees is on the shorter side height-wise, and as a result she does not often sit at the back of her seat. Does this body language mean she is always anxious, or does she sit forward to ensure her feet are not dangling off the floor (which is extremely uncomfortable when sitting for long periods of time)? Again: we want to increase our awareness about body language, not continuously judge people, and that means giving our employees—and even ourselves!—the benefit of the doubt.
Let’s conclude with the same question with which we began: how are you holding yourself right now? Perhaps your head is tilted to the side, suggesting you’re in deep thought about all you have just learned in this blog.
Well, what are you still sitting around for? Back straight, feet flat, hands open—the world of professional body language awaits!
