What’s more stressful than a one-on-one meeting with a manager? In thinking back on my time as a young employee… Well, few things are! I would often find myself possessed with anxiety about the feedback I would receive and how it would be delivered to me. Similarly, as I ascended to leadership positions, I would become riddled with stress about how I could best deliver feedback to my team!
Anyone here had a similar experience? If so, you’re in the right place! This blog will walk through three key tips for effectively delivering feedback, from a standard performance review to a serious conflict negotiation.
Ready to discover how to more productively (and kindly!) deliver feedback?
And > But
One key strategy for effectively delivering feedback is to avoid the qualifier of “but.” When we invoke “but” after a compliment, we’re more likely to give the impression that our compliment was superficial rather than genuine, and that the critique that follows reflects our truly negative thoughts. Over-relying on “but” can also cause us to unfairly critique the person rather than their work—a situation best avoided in the workplace!
As opposed to the separative nature of “but,” “and” is a connective term. When we deliver feedback with “and,” we emphasize that we are working with the recipient to together identify a challenge and to together try to address it for the better!
Critique Sandwich
The critique sandwich, also known as the “positive-negative-positive” method—which I affectionately shorthand as “+-+”—is another useful strategy for delivering feedback. Much like the name suggests, the critique sandwich involves providing positive feedback, providing constructive (“negative”) feedback, and concluding with positive feedback.
The key to successfully implementing this tool is bearing in mind that all three components of this feedback must be related. In this respect, the critique sandwich is just like a real sandwich—the components must pair well together! (I wouldn’t enclose peanut butter and jelly with a set of cell phones, you know?) When preparing a critique sandwich for an employee, we might bear in mind that the first compliment should provide a clean segue for the constructive feedback, and the constructive feedback needs to then open a door for another compliment regarding. Additionally, it’s often productive for the final compliment to be solution-oriented!
(I’d say this strategy is “easy as pie,” but maybe “simple as a sandwich” would be more appropriate…?)
“Right Now”
Last but not least, another key strategy for effectively delivering feedback is framing one’s observations with “right now.” In other words, if an employee is—for example—not meeting their daily quotas, rather than saying, “This employee is not performing well,” we would instead observe, “This employee is not performing well right now.”
A small change, right? So why does it matter?
Appending our feedback with “right now” helps reinforce that anyone, from managers to employees and all those in-between, anyone is capable of growth in an organization. When we recognize that potential for positive change, we are vastly more able to offer constructive—rather than condescending—feedback to our team.
As such: while we may not perfectly nail our delivery every time, when we implement these three strategies—“and” instead of “but,” critique sandwiches, and “right now” framing—any of us can improve our ability to deliver (and even receive) feedback. But there’s no practice more effective than doing, so let us go forth and speak constructive advice into the world!
Dima Ghawi is the founder of a global talent development company with a primary mission for advancing individuals in leadership. Through keynote speeches, training programs and executive coaching, Dima has empowered thousands of professionals across the globe to expand their leadership potential. In addition, she provides guidance to business executives to develop diversity, equity, and inclusion strategies and to implement a multi-year plan for advancing quality leaders from within the organization. Reach her at DimaGhawi.com and BreakingVases.com.
